so this is blogging?

Originally when we decided to join the world of blogging I thought this would be (A) a way to let people know that we hadn't dropped off the face of the earth by moving to Alberta, (B) a place to keep people apprised of how amazingly cute, wonderul and original our kids are and (C) a place to share some random thoughts.

I did not realize how all consuming the world of blogger is! I find I'm constantly thinking about what I could post on my blog. My kids are playing and I'm thinking "is this funny enough to post?" I lie in bed at night and in that dreamy state just before falling asleep I plan out all these super amazing posts that will make people say "wow, I had no idea Heather was so ________ " (fill in the blank) I personally like gifted, incredibly intelligent and perceptive or hilarious. Unfortunately by the time the morning rolls around all those wonderfully insightful posts have been lost in the soggy mush that is my brain and are beyond my ability to remember them. Guess I'll have to settle for just plain read-able. I blame all the poopy diapers.

So not only do I obsessively think about my own blog but I want to check out my friends blogs and see what's happening in their lives. Sidenote: Is it bad that I go to my friends websites to find out what they're doing instead of picking up a phone? Between texting, blogging, and emailing we never have to have contact with another human being again....But that's a whole nother issue. And yes "nother" is a word. I looked it up. So anyways I'm reading my friends blogs and then I'm reading the blogs they link to and the blogs that the links link to.....And in the blink of an eye its 10:00, nobody is dressed and I've missed my multiples group playdate. Sick. It was supposed to be my first time going. Technically I've been once before but since I was the only one who showed up I don't count it.

Did I mention that I haven't washed my hair in 5 days and Ava, although we're sitting outside, isn't wearing any pajama bottoms thanks to a recent diaper blow-out. Omigosh, the spirit of the redneck is getting to me....

Anyways were was I? Oh yes the world of blogging. Another thing about blogging that I never really considered is how vulnerable it is to write something and send it out into the void of the internet. You don't know who will read it. You don't know what they will think about your writing. You don't know what assumptions they'll make of you as a person. Everytime I want to publish a post I hesitate. Should I or shouldn't I? Maybe it needs one more read through. A little more tweaking. Publishing a post leaves you vulnerable, exposed. Like taking off your hoody in math class while writing a test and realizing you're not wearing a t-shirt underneath. Which actually happened by the way. Not my favourite memory of Grade 7.

But for all of that where else would it be possible for so many people to leave their mark in this world? At the end of the day that's what this is all about. It's a place to say I matter, my life counts. It's a place to realize that our existence means something. It's a place that proves the power of the individual and the beauty of the ordinary. And that is pretty amazing.

hc