Thursday, September 28, 2006

A Tribute To My Sisters

Erin (adventurous middle child), Me (oldest & wisest), Jane (glamorous baby of the fam)

Erin came to visit Jane and I in Medicine Hat this past week. She has been living and traveling in S.E. Asia for basically the last 17 months. The picture above is courtesy of a photo fest taken on Erin's last day here. Let me just pause here for a moment to say that it is extremely difficult to take a photo of three women that everyone is happy with. Hugh was taking the pictures and I'm pretty sure he was ready to bash our heads in by the end of it. I'm pretty intuitive about things like that. Of course his threats of death and destruction and the cursing of digital technology may have given it away.

Anyway as I said before Erin came to visit and I can say without hesitation that this was the best visit the three of us have ever had together. Period. There was no drama, no fighting, no pettiness. Typically we've always had good visits when just two of us are together but you throw that third girl into the mix and all hell breaks loose. Maybe it's because we're all drama queens at heart who hate the thought of someone else taking the limelight. Or maybe we're just too competitive. (We're also really sore losers and we've had to ban certain card games unless non-family members can be present.) All I know is that typically when the three of us get together somebody always ends up either hurt, offended, crying or all three.

But not this time. It seems we're finally growing up and learning the lessons of our past. We've realized the value of family and the importance of having in our lives the people who know our stories. We've seen that sometimes it's better to be quiet than right, and that having the last word isn't as satisfying as getting along. We've learned to celebrate each other's achievements without envy or jealousy and truly wish the best for each other. We've begun to understand our differences and give each other room to be different. And we've realized that our similarities are not something to compete over but something to connect over. We've learned to talk without giving or taking offence and in talking we've discovered that we are all are our mother's daughters. These wonderful, quirky personality traits we share are the things that make us distinctly Davis Women. Or Smith-Cyr-Davis-White Women as the case may be.

This is not to say that everything is perfect or that every lesson has been perfectly learned or even that we've learned all the lessons we need to. It's just to say I'm so glad I was born into this family. I'm so grateful to have the sisters I do. And I'm so glad we're not teenagers anymore!

When I was 13 and Jane was 8 I flipped Jane onto her back and just about dislocated her shoulder. Erin and Jane used to regularly reenact WWE Smackdown. It always ended in tears. We called each other names. We pushed each other's buttons. We manipulated. We competed and we tortured each other as only sisters can. Friends with three daughters take heart! My sisters are some of the most important people in my life. They are so woven into the fabric of my DNA that I have often said to really know me you must also know my sisters.

Erin motivates me to eat better and exercise. During this past week Jane called while Erin and I were out and left a message. "I guess you girls are out. I hope you're doing something fun. Heather are you feeling motivated because Erin is here? Are you guys out exercising?" We so were. I would love to have Erin as my personal trainer.

Jane teaches me new make-up tricks and challenges me to be more creative in my fashion and accessory choices. She's the one I ask for ideas when I need a really great outfit. I would be totally content if she were my personal shopper.

Erin is the one I eat bags and bags of penny candy and black licorice with. (She doesn't always eat tofu!)

Jane is the one I watch old Audrey Hepburn movies with and who I quote "You've Got Mail" with.

I knit with Erin.

I paint with Jane.

Erin has taught me there is more than one way to get where you want to go. Everytime I drive with her we discover an "alternate route"!

Jane has taught me to hold your head high no matter what. Even if you've just rear-ended someone and you're not wearing any pants.

Erin brings my compassion to the surface. She holds her hands to her chest because her heart literally hurts for the lost, the lonely, the orphan, and the outcast.

Jane brings my passion to the surface. Her zest for life, her verve, the way her eyes light up when she talks about the things she's passionate about are contagious.

All three of us throw our heads back to laugh and occasionally pee our pants when laughing and we can still sing every song from the Little Mermaid by heart.

During this past week we had a conversation about hot dog condiments. We all like a hot dog with everything on it but I asked Erin & Jane what they would choose if they could only have one condiment. Jane's pick was relish, Erin's, mustard and mine, ketchup. In some weird way this is a metaphor for our relationship with each other. We're individual, unique. We can stand on our own. We're great when we're all together.

This past year has been incredibly difficult. It has been heartwrenching, confusing, painful, and uncertain but through it all we have had each other. It is possible to walk down even the most painful roads when you can walk arm in arm with your sisters.

Erin and Jane you are my sisters, my friends. You inspire me, motivate me, amaze me, cheer me on. You are my safe place to be me. Thank you. I love you. I'm so proud of who you are. As I write this I'm drinking a cup of piping hot Twinings Earl Grey tea in a beautiful Autumn mug and I raise it in honor of you, my sisters.

Okay so this is the part where we usually break into song. "Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters...Lord help the mister who comes between me and my sisters and Lord help the sister who comes between me and my man!"

By the way I'm giving bonus points to anyone who knows what movie I quoted that song from. (Erin and Jane you can't answer!)

11 comments:

  1. "Sniff, Sniff". That's beautiful Heather. I'm in tears. You've given me hope for my girls. I often worry what it will be like with three girls and me for a mom.

    I admire your relationships. I loved watching from a distance and seeing you three grow towards each other. I don't have the same history with you as your other friends but I know what it must mean to you to be were you are at with Erin and Jane. I cry with much joy for you. Literally! I'm very happy for you three.

    Beautiful picture by the way. You're all gorgeous women.

    Oh, the song is from "White Christmas". Come on, I picked up a few things in our friendship along the way ;)

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  2. LOLOLOL!!!! Simone wins the bonus points!

    I thought of you and of course Michelle while I was writing this and you are both outstanding moms. I love seeing pics of both of families with your girls all together, it's like snapshots of my childhood.

    Of course your kids have cooler hair than we did...

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  3. wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....FRICK, I'm always damn well crying when I read this blog.

    And DITTO for me what Simone said...you girls give me hope for my three girls when they're older...

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  4. Hieee,
    Thanks to your heartwarming, beautifully written blog entry, I couldn't just whip a blog entry of my own on this topic. Instead I spent hours and days writting mine in vain, banging my head on the desk and consuming about 40 miny caramilk bars along the way.

    But in all seriousness I loved what you wrote. Thanks for making me sound so cool. Just kidding. I love you.

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  5. Ok as I wipe away my tears I want to say that I have always been a tad bit jealous of you for having sisters. Being the only girl its not quite the same. I am only hoping that maybe I can grasp even a tad bit of that sisterly bonding with my sister laws and a few close girlfriends. But I have been told there is NOTHING like a sisterly bond. I guess I will never know. I feel for Mercy sometimes I wish she had a sister to be close with. But I have to remember that GOD knows best and put each and every one of us in appointed families for a reason.
    It is so neat to see three uniquely different people who are all wonderful individuals who can come together and be so woven together in sisterhood! It truly is a BEAUTIFUL thing! What gorgeous woman you three are!!!!

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  6. Ya, Paul was right, this is a chick blog.

    Hugh

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  7. It's October 5th,

    AND I JUST FINISHED READING YOUR POST BECAUSE IT WAS SO LONG!!!!

    "Easy on the tranny big rig". Break that stuff up over a few posts. It's a story with many chapters. THey didn't give us all the Lord of the Rings in one film did they.

    Blog Rule #254 - posts shall not exceed 3 paragraphs or 200 words.

    COME ON H!!

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  8. I didn't cry.













    OK maybe a little. One....two kleenex but no more!!!

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  9. I think Paul is the official Peanut Gallery for the commenting world!

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  10. Paul I would like to officially apologize for the length of this entry but it just had to be this way.

    In future I'll try to restrain my wordiness but there are no guarantees!

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  11. this is the only blog that the comments can be as funny as the entries!

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